Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us. Eph. 3:20
I have been through a lot of struggles lately with my husband’s job, our church, and an infection that doesn’t seem to want to leave! It has been a dark time, but recently two things have changed for the better. First I have become aware that the antibiotic that I have been on for the past month can cause depression. I wasn’t even aware of how bad things had become until I stopped taking it. And now suddenly I feel like I am coming into the light again. I praise God so much to be off of that medication!
Secondly, I was writing a prayer to God in my journal at the doctor’s office the other day. I am often amazed when I do this because somehow God speaks to me as I write. He showed me one of the reasons that everything has been so hard lately. I have been operating under the false assumption that if things aren’t seeming to work out well now, then it is evidence of what I had always suspected: that God is not good after all.
Once I had actually written this down, I could see how ludicrous this assumption was. I cannot deny that God is good! We humans are sinful, finite and imperfect, but God is the only One who is truly, always, perfectly good. He cannot do anything other than work in my very best interest. It would be impossible for Him. And I began to realize that I was miserable fighting God. Just miserable. I had come to the point that I wanted to believe that He has good planned for me. I wanted to please Him, and I wanted to stop fighting. I wanted to be close to Him again.
I felt better just being aware of these facts, but I knew I couldn’t change these ingrained thought patterns about God on my own. I know satan is just waiting for the chance to drag me into that dark pit again. So I asked God, “Help me to believe that You are good. Help me to want Your will. I want to be at peace with You, and I want to please You.” And He has been answering those prayers.
Despite how it seems now, I can see again how God has amazing and awesome plans for us! I can see that our ultimate happiness lies in following Him wherever He leads. I can see that after all of God’s amazing plans have been executed, we will be quite pleased! We will stand looking in awe and amazement at what God can do and who He is: our good, loving, caring, perfect, gentle, kind, and trustworthy God. ♥
It’s good that you have “eyes” to “see” the ways that Satan is trying to attack your thoughts and relatiohship with God. I don’t know what your prayer life is like, but may I encourage you to really re-evaluate how much time you spend at the feet of Jesus and How much the Word of God is speaking to you as well. I know for me, these two things have been abounding, and my growth, and strengthe to fight off every slimy lie of satan is stronger than ever. Also, if you fast, fast, and if you don’t; than start. I did it once and saw God move. I know that I need to do it more to as I trust and obey. Its extremely Biblical and it is an act of worship to our Father as well. God bless you. May God come and give you strength, growht, wisdome and dissernment in every area of your life. May you hunger to be at His feet, and in His Word on a consistant basis out of desire ot grow and love on our savior and intimate Holy Husband. God Bless, Robin
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“Help me to believe that You are good. Help me to want Your will. I want to be at peace with You, and I want to please You.” – Amen, for you and me both!
It’s almost like, if we don’t see God working we take it as proof that the lie of Him not working (or Satan’s original lie, “God isn’t good and is holding out on you”) is true. We need to fill our spirits with God’s truth, and your prayer helps that.
I’m glad you’re coming out into the light again!
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Joanna, that is so true! That was satan’s original lie. I had never thought of it that way. And we are still tempted to doubt God’s goodness to this day. Thanks for giving me another way to look at this! Jenny
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Another thing along these lines that I have learned lately is that good isn’t always what we think it is. Sometimes if something is hard or uncomfortable, I think it is bad, but a lot of times it turns out to be the best thing for me. That has been a relief to learn for me. I can quit evaluating if things are good or bad and just trust that if they are happening, it must be what is best for me. Hope that makes sense.
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I’m sorry you’re having a rough time.
Our heavenly Father so often uses these dark times to draw us closer to himself!
May He bless us all with a bigger understanding of His amazing love for us!
Jonie
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first, hopefully our spring comes soon LOL–and for someone here who has a difficult time with scriptures (ME)–this is one i do remember–and thought i would share with you–
We are taking every thought captive to the obedience of christ. 2corinthians 10:5
now if only i can do that too huh :)
blessings
wen
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Wendy, that is a great verse! And it is so true. It has been what God has been showing me to do lately, although I had not connected it to that verse until your comment.
Whenever I feel myself looking to the future and beginning to doubt the goodness of God’s plan for us again, I pray that prayer again, “Help to to believe that you are good and you are working out the best plans for us.” Thanks for giving me a verse to apply to this! Jenny
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hello Jenny,
I pray that you are feeling better, no more infection in the name of Jesus :).
I like this: I can see that after all of God’s amazing plans have been executed, we will be quite pleased!
Amen to that, even though we might not always understand that is a truth to hang onto! :)
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Hey Tamela, the doctor thinks the infection is gone and it is just going to take a couple of months for it to completely heal and for the symptoms to go away. So I pray that the doctor is right! ‘
Yeah, I can’t wait for the time when we can look back and be amazed at what God did! :)
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what a great post and a great prayer! i love that about God that his love is so great and glorious and real and though we cant often see all the outworking we can trust him.
really enjoying your blog, blessings, fireball
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